Sort these jokes by: Title (Alphabetically) | Date (latest first) | Rating (highest first) The Nice Lawyer Posted By crazykitten (5 December, 2004) One afternoon a wealthy lawyer was riding in his limosine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he asked his driver to stop and ... Circus Posted By big al (12 October, 2004) How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler... Criminal On Plane Posted By tom--delonge (30 September, 2004) A builder was walking off of a plane when he dropped his mobile phone. He bent down to pick up the phone and a police officer grabbed him. The man was fur... Police Joke Posted By drikx (23 August, 2004) How many Police officers does it take to push an prisoner down the stairs? None.  He fell.... Car Ride Posted By midpikyrozziy (22 August, 2004) An American Soldier serving in the Gulf War was driving his girlfriend around Iraq. Suddenly there was a bump. "What was that?" asked hi... Saddam put into a Safe Place Posted By Woooooo_oooooo (27 June, 2004) The United Nations have decided to put Saddam Husain somewhere that he will never cause anyone any problems ever again. So next season he will play centre-f... The Best Lawyer Posted By Richard (12 May, 2004) How much does the very best lawyer weigh? 5 lbs, if you include the urn.... Female Terrorist Posted By Richard (14 March, 2004) Two female suicide bombers are walking through Afghanistan. One turns to the other and says "Does my bomb look big in this?".... Execution Posted By Richard (8 February, 2004) A chemist, a biologist, and an electrical engineer were on death row waiting for the electric chair. The chemist was brought forward first. "Do you have any... 500 Lawyers in the Ocean Posted By Richard (27 January, 2004) What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start. ... Hit Them With Big Mallets... Posted By Richard (24 January, 2004) The Government has today announced new anti-paedophile measures.  They are all to be lined up and hit on the head really hard with big mallets.  ... CIA Job Interview Posted By Richard (18 January, 2004) These three men are going through CIA training, trying to become secret agents. They finally get through all their written and physical tests when they ar... Gun Shop Posted By Ganon (18 January, 2004) A man goes to a gun shop and asks for a gun and a scope. The owner hands it over and tells the man to test it by looking at the house on the hill, which is ... The Smuggler Posted By Richard (1 January, 2004) Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He's got two largebags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in thebags?" "Sand,"... Smart Lawyer Posted By Richard (19 November, 2003) "You're a high-priced lawyer! If I give you $500, will you answer two questions for me?" "Absolutely! What's the second question?"... The Hit and Run Case Posted By Richard (24 October, 2003) A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close ... Escaped Prisoner Posted By Richard (7 September, 2003) A man escapes from a prison where he had been kept  for 15 years. As he runs away, he finds a house and  breaks into it, looking for money and gun... Clever Lawyer Posted By Richard (31 August, 2003) A (possibly) true story: A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense:"My client merely inserted his arm into the window and ... Bus Conductor Posted By Brujah (21 August, 2003) There was a bus conductor, and he was good at his job. He worked at it for a long time, and after several years of this, he ended up getting really dissati... SAS Training Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003) 3 SAS recruits finally reach the end of their training, and are confronted by their drill instructor, who says to them, "Men, would you die for your country... Lada Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003) A bloke was driving up the M1 in his Lada. Suddenly there is a pop and a bang and the Lada starts to loose speed quickly so he pulls off to the hard shoulde... A Lesson In Cultural Anthropology Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003) 1) In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by... Scouser Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003) What do you call a scouser in suit?The Defendant... Pope In New York Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003) The Pope arrives in New York for a UN conference but he is running a bit late. As he comes out Of the airline termmal he hails a cab. He says to the cabbie ... River Mersey Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003) Why does the river mersey run through Liverpool? Because if it walked it'd get mugged... Military Rank Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003) General: Leaps tall buildings with a single bound, more powerful than a steam engine, faster than a speeding bullet. Gives policy to GOD. Colonel: Leaps sho...