Jokes > Drinking

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5 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women 3/10 - Not Very Good
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
1 Beer never laughs in pity at you wearing T-shirts with "5 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than A Woman" 2 Nobody will think you a damned liar when you say that...

A man 5/10 - Could Be Better But Could Be Worse
Posted By ~giggles~ (27 May, 2003)
One day in a bar, and man runs in out of breath, face red, sweating like a pig.  The bartender says," What on earth is happening out there"  ...

Bet the Barman 8/10 - Pretty Damn Good
Posted By doodoo (27 April, 2003)
A man walks into a bar and orders a drink.  After chatting with some customers, he walks over to the bartender and offers to make a bet.  "I'll...

Dog and Fox 6/10 - Better than average
Posted By monkeyman107uk (15 July, 2003)
Whats the difference between a dog and a fox? About 8 pints....

Embarrassed drinker 7/10 - A Worthwhile Read
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. As he drinks it, he tells the bartender that it is his birthday, he is now 40 today and has never been to a bar ...

Fall Down Drunk 6/10 - Better than average
Posted By Richard (14 August, 2003)
A man, whose level of drunkenness was bordering on the absurd, stood up to leave a bar and fell flat on his face. "Maybe all I need is some fresh air," thou...

Flying drunk 7/10 - A Worthwhile Read
Posted By nightvixen (20 February, 2004)
This man walks into a bar that is on top of a very tall building, he orders one large drink. Downs it in one, goes over to a window and jumps out. 10 minue...

Man in a Pub 6/10 - Better than average
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
A man had been drinking at a pub all night. When he stands up to leave, he falls flat on his face. He tries to stand one more time, but to no avail. Again, ...

Martooni 8/10 - Pretty Damn Good
Posted By Richard (3 February, 2004)
A lady walks into a bar and says, "Barkeep, gimme a martooni." The bartender goes back and fixes her a martini. She downs it and says, "Barkeep, gimme ano...

Pub bet 5/10 - Could Be Better But Could Be Worse
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
This guy walked into a bar and said to the barman "I bet you £100 that I can pee into that glass which is 10 metres away without gettin even one little drop...

Push 7/10 - A Worthwhile Read
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
A man is in bed with his wife when they hear a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it's half past three in the morning. "I'...

Six pack 6/10 - Better than average
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
There were three men, Bill, James and Andy working on the top of a high rise building in New York. As James was cleaning 1 of the windows on the 100th floor...

Skeleton in the Bar 5/10 - Could Be Better But Could Be Worse
Posted By Richard (14 August, 2003)
A skeleton walks into a bar and asks for a beer and a mop....

Tarmac 5/10 - Could Be Better But Could Be Worse
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
A man walks into a pub with a lump of Tarmac under his arm. The barman says "can I help you sir?" The man replies "Yes i'll have a pint of lager and one for...

Terry the toothless termite 6/10 - Better than average
Posted By makhulu (13 March, 2005)
Terry the toothless termite goes into a pub and asks a man at the bar, "Is the bar tender here?"...

The Beer Festival 6/10 - Better than average
Posted By Richard (1 January, 2004)
After Great Britain's Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents decided it would be fun to hit a pub in London and go out for a beer. The first sits down an...

Too Much of Everything 4/10 - Definately Room For Improvement
Posted By Funny.co.uk (8 February, 2003)
A man was sitting in the bar with a pint of beer, a cigarette and shouting at the top of his voice. He got kicked out so he started making his way home. Whe...

Winning Money on the Horse 8/10 - Pretty Damn Good
Posted By aronel (9 December, 2003)
A man walks into a bar and orders a drink. While waiting for his beer he notices a very large brandy glass filled to the brim with 10 dollar bills. There ...


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