Microsoft Haikus

Posted in Funny Lists on June, 27 2004 8:22 PM

Just imagine if they replaced all the unhelpful microsoft error messages with Japanese Haiku* poems. *(Haikus have three lines and seventeen syllables: first line is five syllables, second line ...
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Real Hong Kong Subtitles

Posted in Funny Lists on June, 27 2004 7:53 PM

These are actual English subtitles that have been used in films from Hong Kong: > Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep. > Darn, I'll burn you into a BBQ chicken! > Take ...
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Top Ten Children's Books that Won't be Written

Posted in Funny Lists on June, 27 2004 7:42 PM

Here are some children's books that will NEVER be written: 10: You're Different and That's Not Good 9: The Boy Who Died After Eating All His Vegetables 8: The Childrens' Guide to Hitch-Hiking 7: ...
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20 Responses to Telemarketers

Posted in Funny Lists on June, 03 2004 11:45 PM

1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. 2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, becaus ...
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Tips for Northern Americans moving South

Posted in Funny Lists on May, 22 2004 3:29 PM

Being British we only understand about half of these.... Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later how to use it. If you forget a Southerner's name, refer to him ...
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21 Reasons Not to have Kids

Posted in Funny Lists on May, 18 2004 7:42 PM

A mother from Austin, Texas writes "Things I've leanred from my children":   A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill 2,000 sq. feet of house 4 inches deep. If you spray ...
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Things You don't want to Hear During Surgery

Posted in Funny Lists on May, 14 2004 6:49 PM

1. Oops! 2. I've never seen that before 3.We can get it back don't worry 4.Grab that, we'll probably need it later. 5.Don't touch stuff Charlie! 6.Now what goes there. 7.We have bad news... on ...
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10 Reasons not to go Jogging

Posted in Funny Lists on May, 09 2004 9:30 AM

1. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 now & we don't know where the heck she is.2. The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy ...
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