Jokes > Education

Scouser School Test


Posted By Funny.co.uk (03 February, 2003)
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1. Craig has 0.5 kilos of cocaine. If he sells an 8 ball to Vinnie for 300 quid and 90 grams to Tomo for 90 quid a gram, what is the street value of the rest of his hold?

2. Marcus pimps 3 brassers. If the price is 40 quid a ride, how many rides per day must each brasser perform to support Vinnie's 500 quid a day crack habit?

3. Whacker wants to cut the kilo of cocaine he bought for 7,000 quid, to make a 20% profit. How many grams of strychnine will he need?

4. Darren got 6 years for murder. He also got 350,000 for the hit. If his common law wife spends 33,100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out? Extra Credit Bonus: How much more time will Darren get for killing the slapper that spent his money?

5. If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square meters and the average letter is 1 square meter, how many letters can be sprayed with eight fluid ounce cans of spray paint with 20% extra paint free?

6. Spike steals Wayne's skateboard. As Spike skates away at a speed of 35mph, Wayne loads his brother's armalite. If it takes Wayne 20 seconds to load the gun, how far will Spike have travelled when he gets whacked?

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