One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local
church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem, my husband keeps falling
asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I
do?"
"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with
you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion
to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the
leg."
In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off.
Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made
the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs.
Jones.
"Jesus!", Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with
the hatpin.
"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon,
Mr. Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your
redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards Mrs.
Jones.
"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the
hatpin.
"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long,
Mr. Jones again winked off. However, this time the minister did
not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions
that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin
again.
The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she
bore him his 99th son?"
Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You
stick that goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in
half and shove it up your ass!"
