Jokes > Religion

Jesus And Moses


Posted By Birdynumnum (28 April, 2005)
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Jesus and Moses are fishing out on Moses's big boat.  While chilling with a beer, Moses comments "You know what mate, it has been many many centuries since I last performed a miricle.  I wonder if I can still do it?".  Jesus looks at him and says "It has been over two thousand years since I last performed a miricle".  At this point Moses rests his fishing rod on the rest and gets up.  "Where you going?" asks Jesus.  "Well, I'm going to go to the stern and attempt a miricle.  See if I still have the knack!" to which Moses walks up to the rail and stands and arches his back and with a commanding voice shouts out "OCEAN OBEY MY COMMAND AND LAY ME A PATH!".  Suddenly there is a loud roar and the ocean splits in two showing the dry sea bed, fishes flapping around unable to breath.  Then just as quickly the sea reforms.  "GET IN!" shouts moses "I've still got it!"

Jesus looks on and applaudes.  "Your turn!" commands Moses.  Jesus finnishes his beer and walks up to the same rail and jumps into the ocean and sinks like a stone.  Knowing that Jesus can't swim, Moses jumps in and rescues his friend.  "You ok? What was you trying to do?" ask Moses as Jesus cough's up sea water.  "I'm ok, trying to walk on water, guess I'm a bit rusty thats all" snaps Jesus as he walks up to the rail again and jumps in.  Yet again Jesus sinks like a stone and yet again Moses jumps in and saves him.

"What do you thinks wrong?" asks Moses.  "I don't know but I must figure it out!" says Jesus.  "Well lets work it out logically, whats different this time compared to the last time you did this miricle" asks Moses.

Jesus answers "Not much, the only difference is last time I did this, I didn't have these fucking holes in my hands and feet!"

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