A boy just graduated from school and he wanted to celebrate, so he invited his girlfriend round for a shag.

He warned his girlfriend to try to be quiet since his bed is a bunk bed and his nine year old brother sleeps bellow him.

They got in his bedroom room and on his bunk bed at the top. He told the girlfriend to say lettuce when she wanted it faster and tomato when she wanted to change position.

So they start and the girlfriend says

Lettuce, lettuce,lettuce,Lettuce, lettuce,lettuce tomato Lettuce, lettuce,lettuce tomato Lettuce, lettuce,lettuce,Lettuce, lettuce,lettuce tomato Lettuce, lettuce,lettuce,Lettuce, lettuce,lettuce etc...

Then his nine year old brother wakes up and says will you two stop making sandwiches, your getting mayonaise all over my face.