Sex Workers Quality Control Form

Posted in Other Funny on March, 03 2005 11:41 AM

In this increasingly bureaucratic world in which we live in, we are all subject to more and more check-ups, quality control sessions, feedback meetings and proactive management whatsits. It should, therefore, come as no surprise that even in the oh-so-competitive field of phone sex operators, a good program of quality control is essential.

The following is the standard form used in such quality control situations, with explanatory notes. Names have been entirely made up.

Operators name: Horny_Housewife
Project name: My_Husbands_Away_3
QC'd by: John Smith
Length of call: 10 mins 07 secs
(all fields below marked out of ten)

Voice: 7. Comments: Good sultry tones, excellent use of breathing technique. Nice shades of innocence to begin with.
Negotiation: 5. Comments: You really need to work on this. It's very important to find out what the caller wants and go with it. This one seemed somewhat surprised by your involvement of the ironing board.
Politeness: 8. Comments: Superb. Even in the face of his increasingly desperate attempts to keep up, you managed not to reveal your contempt.
Description: 7. Comments: Very good. Just the right amount of detail, concentrating on feel and smell rather than looks. I particularly enjoyed the reference to the "ever boring hum of the tumbledryer".
Timing: 9. Comments: Almost perfect. Caller finished satisfied, and you kept a high level of urgency in your voice, which encouraged him.
Teasing: 10. Comments: You remain the master at this. Caller initally expressed a desire for a quick call, but you managed to stretch it out to over ten minutes.
Detail: 7. Comments: Please remember, description of underwear should occour before it's ripped off/stripped off/seductively removed. Some of our most frequent callers demand this.
Vocabulary: 6. Comments: Although I appreciate the passion in your voice, screaming "F*** me!" over and over again can get a little boring. I suggest a more varied selection of terms.
Imagination: 8. Comments: Variety of positions, clothes, situations and toys. Caller couldn't believe his luck. My congratulations, especially on the use of the scarf as an impromptu bondage tool.
Orgasm: 9. Comments: Textbook. Loud, long and gloriously fake. Had other girls in other booths stopping to listen and take notes.

Overall: 8. Comments: A few areas to work on, but overall you are progressing well. I am recommending you for a pay rise.

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