There are few pleasure in life as great as seeing a top-notch performer in a
venue far, far smaller than they are capable of selling out. Jeremy Lion warmed
up for his What's The Time, Mr Lion? tour of decent-sized UK theatres
with a show in the tiny attic above Hen & Chickens in Islington ("one
of London's foremost...rooms" according to Mr Lion himself), and didn't even
need a microphone.
Known to his parents as Justin Edwards - and to comedy afficionados as one
third of The Consultants (Perrier Best Newcomers, 2001) -Jeremy Lion is an
endearingly rubbish, utterly hilarious, and worryingly hard-drinking
children's entertainer, constantly touring around and trying to get his show
into schools. He was nominated for the Perrier in his own right last summer, but
says that kind of things doesn't impress local education authorities.
Loosely based around arrangements for a teddy bears picnic, Mr Lion manages
to work in a worryingly graphic explanation of the birds and the bees (in which,
dressed as a blackbird, he simulates intercourse with his assistant, Leslie, who
is dressed as a bumble bee), sings a lengthy educational song which gets pretty
much everything wrong ("Emmeline Pankhurst was the world's first lesbian"), and
drinks...well, a hell of a lot. The grand finale - a puppet show of Goldilocks
and the Three Bears, enacted entirely with drinks standing in for all the
characters, and becoming more incoherent and inaccurate as the story
progresses - is a comic masterpiece, and still has me giggling a month
after the fact. Goldilocks happens upon "the Three Wise Men - Ernest & Julio
Gallo", her grandmother - a bottle of Gordon's - is described as "in dire need
of a mixer", and the porridge is, of course, Special Brew ("but the third
bowl...[takes massive swig]...was spot on. So she had another..."). The show
ends with Mr Lion semi-comatose next to his massive clock, and Leslie in full
KISS regalia, ready for his late-night performance in a glam-rock version of
The Vagina Monologues.
Proper character comedy is one of the hardest things to do right, and when
it's done right - as it is here - it can be sublime. When Jeremy and Leslie
find themselves near you, don't hesitate. It's one of the funniest shows out
there.
