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Horn broken. Watch for finger.
Your kid may be an honors student,
but you're still an idiot.
All generalizations are false.
Cover
me. I'm changing lanes.
I brake for no apparent reason.
Learn from
your parents' mistakes - use birth control.
I'm not as think as you drunk
I am.
Forget about World Peace...Visualize using your turn
signal.
We have enough youth, how about a fountain of Smart?
He
who laughs last thinks slowest.
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at
math.
It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get
you.
Auntie Em, Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog.
Dorothy.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Time
is what keeps everything from happening at once.
I love cats...they taste
just like chicken.
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
Forget
the Joneses, I keep us up with the Simpsons.
Born free...Taxed to
death.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
Laugh alone
and the world thinks you're an idiot.
Rehab is for quitters.
I get
enough exercise just pushing my luck.
Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other
times I let him sleep.
All men are idiots, and I married their
King.
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